so it appears i finally got success in using cmake and compiling sfml for android....here is what i found out should others have the same issue.
1 - I was initially using cmake 2.8.7 and was having all of those problems and errors outlined in my first post
2 - I then put some message statements into the cmake toolchain file and realized that it wasnt pulling in the ANDROID_NDK environment variable i was setting from the command line so as far as cmake was concerned the path to the ANDROID_NDK was "". So I just added that variable on the command line to cmake and was able to cmake successfully
cmake -DCMAKE_TOOLCHAIN_FILE=../cmake/toolchains/android.toolchain.cmake -DANDROID_USE_STLPORT=1 -DANDROID_NDK=/home/daniel/Desktop/programming/android/adt-x86/ndk-r9 ..
3 - but at that point I would then try to do the make but would receive errors in the compilation process due to the SONAME_FLAG issue that was detailed in the other post. I did some googling and people recommened to update cmake to at least 2.8.9 to fix that issue
4 - So i go to the cmake website and get the latest version of 2.8.12 and installed it
5 - I then went back and deleted my build dir and recreated it empty and ran cmake again.....now cmake would give errors about unable to find certain files and I found that it was putting its version number (2.8.12) into that path of where it expected some of the cmake files inside the SFML drectories
6 - I then went and downgraded to cmake 2.8.9 and started this process over again
7 - this time success with cmake and make to build the libraries
8 - now i did still have to specify the ANDROID_NDK on the command line for cmake as for some reason it wouldnt pick up the environment variable of the same name i would export right before doing the cmake
hopefully anyone else running into this problem then this will help them out
now my next task is figuring out how to get the sfml into my programs. I have already been doing some NDK stuff on my own with raw OpenGL so I have figured out a little of it. I also dabbled with SDL2 when I was hitting these brick walls with SFML and successfully got it setup, but I much prefer the c++ interface of SFML so I came back to give it another shot in compiling it and success this time.
If anyone has a step by step process to use SFML in an eclipse project then let me know.